“There are some people in life that make you laugh a little louder, smile a little bigger, and live just a little bit better.”
Fostering friendships over long distances isn’t easy. A friendship, like any relationship, takes effort. We all lead busy lives and finding time to reconnect can often be hard to come by, but carving out that time for the people who matter most is worth it.
I grew up on the East Coast but have been on West Coast now for more than a decade. Yet I think the place where you spent your youth/adolescence has a way of shaping you that is hard to shake off, no matter how long you live in your new, adopted home. At least that’s been the case for me. I moved to Arizona at 19 and California at 24 but “home” to me still feels like my East Coast roots. It’s where I grew up and where I established the kind of close, lifelong friendships that are hard to come by. Despite living on the other side of the country for the better part of a decade, I have maintained these friendships. The girlfriends from my youth have transformed into powerful female friendships that I absolutely cherish.
A combination of bi-annual visits (sometimes more, sometimes less especially now with a child) and thanks to modern technology, has allowed me to remain connected and close to women that have known me through all the phases of my life. There’s something about friendships with people who have quite literally watched you grow up that are hard to replicate. I have made some meaningful friendships with friends in my adult years as well of course, but the nostalgia of remembering old times and reminiscing on our youth is a feeling that is impossible to capture with anyone other than a lifelong pal.
So how do I make sure my friendships continue to thrive despite the physical distance? Pretty simple really. Technology of course has played a huge role in our lives. I have a group chat with my girlfriends where we do everything from discussing plans for dinner to book/movie recommendations and of course more personal updates as well. Even though I can’t make it to most of the physical meetups I love being a part of it and simply knowing what they’re up to.
I’m also old school and love reconnecting over the phone. It has certainly become harder since having my daughter (the hours long convos are a thing of the past) but I do my best to chat even if it’s for 20 minutes. Sometimes you just need to hear that person’s voice. But really what it comes down to it is my desire to remain connected to them. I text/call/email/ send cards, etc., because I want my friends to know how much I value them in my life. You make time if you want to. For me, maintaining my female friendships has been integral to my well-being. Having a group of strong, confident, beautiful and amazing women in my life has brought me countless memories, wise words of advice and more laughs than I can count. It’s nice to know that there are people out there that care for me. We may live far apart from one another but I envision many, many more years of love, laughter and friendship.
“Its not what we have in life, but who we have in our life that matters.”